A cancer journey starts out with a shock. In 2017 my husband’s diagnosis of stage 4 pancreatic cancer was a curve ball we hadn’t seen coming. Initially, we were scared, confused, overwhelmed and anxious.
With some time to sort through our thoughts and feelings, however, we eventually settled back into our “normal;” we were able to focus on our faith, and trust that God would provide everything we needed.
For the most part, his cancer hasn’t affected our daily quality of life. My husband still works full time, goes to the gym several days a week, does our yard work and even does most of our cooking – all the normal things he did previous to having cancer.
However, this week we head back to Mayo Clinic, for some important test results.
Especially today, I’m reminded of something important that I’ve learned in this process; I’ve learned to hold two conflicting thoughts or beliefs at the same time.
In other words, I DO believe…and, I pray for God to help me with my unbelief.
I continually teach about the importance of validating our thoughts and feelings, and so I’ve told myself, “I have every reason to feel a bit anxious about the results.”
AND, at the same time, I focus on what I believe with every cell of my body; God loves my husband and He wants nothing but the very best for him, ALWAYS. I believe God will provide complete healing in His timing, and as He knows is best.
That’s how we’ve had an inner peace, confidence and joy – regardless of any doctor’s visits, test results or anything else. THAT’s the result of living wholeheartedly.
(How are you struggling with belief and unbelief? Give yourself permission to acknowledge both.)